I have always been a worrier for as long as I could remember and when I started experiencing anxiety attacks I didn’t think there was anything really wrong – I thought it was normal. The first time I realized that something was wrong was in 2013, I was on my way home after spending 18 hours in the lab with no sleep or rest and a lot of stress. I started experiencing major heart palpitations, my eye sight weakened, I was all of a sudden confused and didn’t know where I was. That was very scary for me, the whole time I kept on telling myself to just breathe (I thank yoga for this). I kept breathing until I came to and was able to find my way home. I later realized that I was so worried about life and living in the future that I was in constant fear.
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear. – Mark Twain
It is amazing how fear just makes everything look so big and scary and one needs courage to face it. Courage is a word that has been on my mind for a few days and for the first time I really understand its meaning and appreciate the power it possess and it is for that reason that I have decided to live contagiously every single day of my life because I owe that to myself, to face my daily tiny and big (but actually tinier) fears and do it anyway. When I think about it i can’t help but put it this way. For me living contagiously is like walking into a fire afraid because I have lied to myself that I will not make it, I will fail, I am wasting my time, I will be ridiculed, but I continue walking afraid anyway because of the courage I possess within me, the courage that has been dormant in my soul all along but not anymore.