It is very common to find cousins/nephews/nieces and godchildren all living under one roof being raised as siblings in African homes. I grew up with a brother who I only learned later was actually my uncle who came to live with us when he was about 4/5. My parents however raised all their kids on their own, so my sisters and I don’t have a second home like most people. My father preferred it this way probably because at some point in his life he was raised by other people and my mother was raised by her aunt.
Seeing as I didn’t have a ‘second home’ home has always been home, even when I left for University I would come home for all my breaks, I found it strange when friends would opt to go anywhere else but home. When I completed my studies one of my wish was to come back home and spend some time with my parents. I was blessed to get a job in my field and still live at home (lucky me). I come from a really tiny town (population of about 19 000) where nothing seems to be happening apart from the party life (I am not the type of person so I spend all my time in the house/ gym or work) but I love it so much.
The fact that the town is small and nothing major ever happens, most of the people I grew up with have left for the big city so most of these people are shocked when I tell them I have moved back home. I guess its just normal for one to leave the nest right after your first job when you are making your own money and can afford your own place, I have nothing against that but there are a lot of advantages to living at home. Just the other day I was thinking to myself how blessed I am to actually see my parents every single morning before I go to work and I have learned that as parents get older they want to be surrounded by their children more.
I can’t help but laugh when people ask their weird questions and make their uninformed comments about living at home with my parents at my age. Here are just some of the things I have heard:
- You are not going to grow.
- When are you going to move out of your parents home?
- You will never be independent while living with your parents.
- You will never make your own decisions while living with your parents.
- You will always be a daddy’s little girl.
- You must have a lot of money because you don’t spend any money while living at home
I believe staying at home has not hindered my growth at all, we all have different reasons for moving back home, mine was to spend time with my retired parents while I gain valuable experience in the mining industry and I am doing both. I have not lived with strangers before so it is a bonus that my ‘roomies’ are the same people who gave birth to me and know me so well. They understand that when I get home from work I lock myself in my room for at least 20 minutes and I should not be disturbed something some people would not get or that I need to switch on the radio every morning at 4 am to catch up with everything that happened when I was asleep. Most importantly I love that I get to just see them, have deep conversations them, this are moments I will treasure forever.